Badass
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Work History

King of Macedon

• Eliminated potential rivals to the throne to secure a successful career as King.
• Worked with a group of trusted generals to advance campaigns against all those who stood in opposition to the empire, including the Greek city of Perinthus.
• Suppressed countless revolts and inspired loyalty through shows of strength and compassion.

Notable Achievements

• Became King of Macedon by the age of twenty.
• United Greece under common rule.
• Conquered the Persian Empire.
• Remained undefeated in battle while building the most expansive empire known to man (5,200,000 km2).
• Tutored by Aristotle at the Temple of the Nymphs from 343 to 340 BC.
• Honored guest to the Illyrian King.

Founded Over 20 Cities

Ai-Khanoum | Alexandria Arachosia | Alexandria Ariana | Alexandria Bucephalous | Alexandria in Orietai | Alexandria Carmania | Alexandria Eschate | Alexandria on the Caucasus | Alexandria on the Indus | Alexandria Troas | Alinda | Cebrene | Charax Spasinu | Ghazni | Iskandariya | Iskenderun | Merv

“It was my destiny to conquer Persia, so I did.”

Outstanding Achievements

• Prevented the annihilation of Planet Earth by mediating three epic battles between good and evil: Ra vs Apep, Heru-Bekhutet vs Set, Horus vs Set.
• Developed a system of writing to give mankind the ability to share knowledge.
• Erected temples in: Abydos, Hesert, Urit, Per-Ab, Rekhui, Ta-ur, Sep, Hat, Pselket, Talmsis, Antcha-Mutet, Bah, Amen-heri-ab and Ta-kens.
• Published a prehistoric best-seller: The Emerald Tablets of Thoth.

Work History

2561 BC – Present | Self-employed | Counselor
Responsibilities: Acting as advisor to the gods, arbitrating heavenly disputes, drawing on eons of wisdom to establish a clear line of communication between the mortal realm and the world of spirits. Notable clients included Horus, the sun god Ra and Osiris.

2557 BC – 2560 BC | Egyptian Pantheon | Deity
Responsibilities: Maintaining the universe and leading humanity down the middle path. Allowing neither good nor evil to gain an unfair advantage over the other.

2554 BC – 2557 BC | Ra’s Boat | Greeter
Responsibilities: Ensuring the continued progression of day and night. Fixing mechanical issues and maintaining a clean, hospitable environment on Ra’s boat. Managing the logistics of a non-profit and promoting positive relations between the sun and the moon.

Notable Awards & Achievements

• Awarded “One of the Seven Wonders of the World” for the Artemis Temple in Ionia Turkey.
• Named a minor planet: 105 Artemis.
• Named two lunar craters: the Artemis Chasma and the Artemis Corona.
• Earned an outstanding achievement award in the field of animal rights.
• Voted most likely to be raised by wolves.

Special Talents

• Archery/Hunting
• Ability to communicate with bears, golden horned deer, dogs, boar, guinnea foal and buzzard hawks.
• Utilizing nature’s resources to survive and thrive in a minimalist way.
• Can track a wild boar at a distance of 500 yards.

Work History

Artemis & the Wolf NGO • Founder • 2100 BC to Present

• Raise awareness about the declining wolf population in the southern regions of the Appalachians.
• Organize rescue missions to save stranded wolf cubs.
• Fundraise via social media, grassroots and Kickstarter campaigns.
• Recruit and train volunteers in methods of conservation and restoration.
• Serve to protect a wide variety of species by promoting an attitude of compassion and interconnectedness.

Gaia’s Tavern & Ski Resort • Rescue Ranger • 2304 BC to 2100 BC

• Saved stranded gods and demi-gods from the storm-ravaged slopes of Mount Olympus.
• Checked slope conditions and issued warnings in the event of inclement weather.
• Maintained ski rental equipment during downtimes.
• Led slope safety classes for visiting groups and individuals.

Jack’s Bait Shop • Floor Manager • 2307 BC to 2304 BC

• Helped customers select proper tackle rigs, fish hooks and sinkers.
• Accounted for inventory and made sure merchandise is stocked and organized.
• Managed a team of sales professionals, boosted morale and cultivated a strong team-based work ethic.

Books and Publications

The Isotopic Elements and Isotopes | The Discovery of Radium | Pierre Curie | Radioactive Substances | Life is Not Easy, So What? | Radiology in War

Outstanding Achievements

• First woman to win a Nobel prize
• First person to win two Nobel Prizes and the only person to win in multiple sciences
• Discovered polonium and radium
• Elected a member of the International Atomic Weights Committee
• First female professor at the University of Paris
• Lectured in Belgium, Brazil, Spain and Czechoslovakia

Work Experience

Red Cross Radiology Service
Director | 1914 – 1918

• Established the first military radiology center in France.
• Set up 20 mobile radiological vehicles and 200 grounded radiological units.
• Trained numerous assistants on safe equipment handling and maintenance.
• Facilitated the treatment of over 1M soldiers.

Société D’encouragement Pour L’industrie Nationale
Commissioned Researcher | 1894 – 1897

• Developed and ran a series of novel experiments aimed at better understanding the atomic behavior of metals.
• Made crucial discoveries regarding the magnetic properties of steel.
• Published findings that would go on to benefit mankind’s understanding of magnetism.

Notable Achievements

• Pioneered an enduring system of knowledge to lay a foundation for Western philosophy.
• Discovered Aether, the fundamental building block of heavenly bodies.
• Utilized scientific and political rhetoric to guide mankind towards an age of enlightenment.

Publications & Treatises

Categories, On Interpretation, Prior Analytics, Posterior Analytics, Topics, On Sophistical Refutations, On Generation and Corruption, On Sleep and Wakefulness, Physics, Metaphysics, Nicomachean Ethics, Politics, Sophist De Anima (On the Soul) and Poetics

Work History

• Founder of the Lyceum | 335 BC – Present
• Head of Research – Mytilini | 348 – 347 BC
• Head of the royal academy of Macedon | 343 – 335 BC
• Private and Public Instruction | 335 – 322 BC
  Notable students: Alexander the Great, Ptolemy, Cassander, Aristoxenus, Dicaearchus, Demetrius of Phalerum, Eudemos of Rhodes, Harpalus, Hephaestion and Meno

Education

Plato’s Academy in Athens | 328 BC – 347 BC | General Wisdom

Areas of Study

Physical: anatomy, biology, astronomy, embryology, geography, geology, meteorology, physics and zoology
Non-Physical: aesthetics, ethics, government, metaphysics, politics, economics, psychology, logic, rhetoric, linguistics, theology, education, foreign customs, literature, music and poetry

Highlights

• Relieved mild to severe cases of possession.
• Transmuted water into wine.
• Discovered a cure for blindness.
• Organized a food drive for over 4000 people.

Skills

• Client relations 73%
• New Business Management 93%
• Design Prototyping 97%
• Medical Assistance 85%
• Quantum Physics & Theology 100%

Experience

34 BC to 0 AD | CEO at JC LLC

Responsibilities: Leading a team of 13 apostles into an age of self-empowerment, handling bureaucratic resistance and acting as company spokesman, organizing teams of specialists to promote new product ideas, logistics, operations, inventory, small-business direction and corporate branding identity.

38 BC to 34 BC | Manager at Starbucks of Nazareth

Responsibilities: Training new hires to brew random ales, handling merchant disputes, resolving customer claims, managing social media relations and responding to complaints in a timely manner.

41 BC to 38 BC | Internship at Mary’s Woodshop

Responsibilities: Fetching timber from the local woodcutters, sanding various types of furniture, customer relations, assisting the master carpenter with odd jobs and daily chores, negotiating prices with local merchants, organizing and distributing flyers for seasonal promotions.

Education

42 BC | Bethlehem Community College in Judea | B.S. in Woodworking & Carpentry
37 BC | University of Nazareth | M.A. in Sociology

Qualifications

• Positive female role model, inspirational speaker and creative problem solver.
• Decorated military strategist with a flair for interpersonal bureaucracy.
• Extraordinary leader characterized by a relentless ability to quickly overcome obstacles and enemy opposition.
• Strong connection to divine guidance coupled with an unshakable will to act.
• Self-motivated revolutionary able to rise above peasant conditions to secure high prestige from the French Royal Family by the age of nineteen.

Career Highlights

• Successfully advised Charles XII and the Duke of Alençon in key military operations.
• Recaptured strategic bridges along the River Loire to secure victory during the subsequent advance on Reims.
• Led the French Army to victory at the siege of Orléans (1429) in only 9 days, consequently marking a landmark shift in the Hundred Years War.

Battles

• 1428 | Burgundian raid against Domrémy
• 1429 | Rouvray, Jargeau, Meung-sur-Loire, Beaugency, Patay

Awards & Achievements

• 1429 | Played an integral role in the crowning of Charles VII
• 1909 | Beatified by the Catholic Church
• 1920 | Canonized by Pope Benedict XV

Areas of Expertise

Botany | Climate Change | Forestry and Conservation | Planetary Alignment | Civil Engineering

Work Experience

Earth | Guardian | 332 BC to Present
Responsibilities include: Revitalizing expansive territories of nutritionally deficient soil. Organizing large-scale natural disasters to counteract the proliferation of humans. Combating rampant deforestation and managing carbon levels in the environment. Generating and sustaining energetic impulses that guide the human race along their evolutionary journey.

Earth | Liaison | 4.53 billion BC to 3100 BC
Responsibilities included: Creating the Titans, Primordial and Chthonic deities. Acting as mediator between the gods and the newly formed race of Humans. Ensuring the survival, well-being and comfort of all living creatures under my care. Maintaining balance within the ecosystem and harmony among all living beings.

Earth | Founder | 4.58 billion BC to 4.53 billion BC
Responsibilities included: Organizing primordial matter into recognizable forms. Working extensively in a timeless void to seed the basic ingredients of life. Creating stable rock formations using the gradual movement of water. Maintaining overall cleanliness and organization in the workplace.

Education

Beta 5 Star System College
B.A. in Liberal Arts | Minor in Social Services